Dating expert shares the ‘brutal truth’ about single parents in the dating world: ‘Stop doing this now’
- Louanne Ward, from Perth, said single parents can’t use their kids as an excuse
- Some will say their kids ‘come first’ in an effort to breadcrumb their partner
A dating expert has shared the ‘brutal truth’ about single parents in the dating world – and why you should never let someone use their kids as an ‘excuse’ to avoid spending time with you.
Professional matchmaker and relationship expert Louanne Ward, from Perth, said everyone knows that anyone who has kids will always put them first, but if someone truly cares about you, then they will also make time for you in a dating capacity.
‘Don’t allow somebody to use their kids as an excuse to breadcrumb you,’ Louanne said in a clip on Instagram.
Breadcrumbing is a behaviour in which one partner gives the other partner just enough energy, time, attention, affection and affirmation to provide some of the elements of being in a romantic relationship, but never quite enough.
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A dating expert shared the ‘brutal truth’ about single parents – and why you should never let someone use their kids as an ‘excuse’ to avoid spending time with you (Louanne Ward pictured)
Louanne explained that breadcrumbing as a tactic is commonly used by single parents who don’t really want to date and instead want to use their children as an excuse.
‘Any logical person knows when they’re dating a single parent – whether it’s a single mum or a single dad – that parental obligations come first,’ she said.
‘So if you’re dating someone and they keep saying to you, “oh, my kids come first”, then know that this is very much a convenient excuse for them to breadcrumb you with a legitimate reason to do just that.’
Louanne explained that ‘nobody’ is going to say that their ‘mummy or daddy life’ come before their kids and they will ‘drop everything to be at your beck and call’.
But if someone feels the repeated need to ‘continuously tell you or point out to you that their kids come first’, then they are using their kids as an excuse to have ‘everything their own way rather than put in the required amount of effort to date someone’.
Louanne (pictured) said it doesn’t add up because once children have been dropped to school or put to bed, it’s perfectly easy to ‘pick up the phone and call that person you’re dating’
Louanne said it doesn’t add up because once children have been dropped to school or put to bed, it’s perfectly easy to ‘pick up the phone and call that person you’re dating’.
‘Someone will always find room to connect with you even if they can’t go out on dates every second night [if they like you],’ she said.
‘They will put in the adequate amount of time and effort required – whether they have or haven’t got kids.’
She said it’s simply a ‘dating tactic’ single parents use as an excuse for their bad behaviour.
Louanne concluded: ‘Dating is a two-way street; having children may make it harder for you but don’t expect others to accept your crumbs. You have to put in equal effort in other ways’.
Hundreds who saw the clip were thankful to Louanne for sharing the information.
Previously, Louanne revealed the one mistake single women make is ditching a man because he wants to help fix their problems rather than just listen to them.
She said she thinks it’s a ‘massive red flag’ if a man doesn’t offer to help his girlfriend, wife or the woman he’s dating with their problems.
Simple ways to upgrade your dating profile
1. Use photos that represent who you truly are not who you are trying to be.
2. Embrace your personality if you attempt to play it safe, people will be unsure about how original and fun you will be in real life.
3. Make your profile a unique story, not a shopping list – nobody really cares that you love cats, red wine, and walks on the beach.
4. Write a profile that is honest, from the heart and shows your personality.
Source: Louanne Ward
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