How can I tell my dream girl that I’m incontinent without putting her off?

DEAR DEIDRE: HOW do I tell my dream girl that I wear adult nappies because I’m incontinent?

We’ve been dating for three months. She’s 28, I’m 29.


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When I was 18, I fell off a friend’s motorcycle and broke my back.

While I was able to learn to walk again, I’ve been left with little control over my bowels.

I didn’t date for years after my accident, because I didn’t think anyone would accept me.

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The first girl I dated told me it was “too much to handle”.

Now I’ve met this great woman and I can really see a future with her.

But I’m scared she’ll run a mile once I tell her the truth. It is not something I can hide for much longer.

DEIDRE SAYS: This one detail does not change all the many good qualities you have – the right person will see that.

The anxiety of not telling her is probably worse than the conversation itself.

Bring it up when you are feeling good about yourself, and somewhere you won’t be interrupted – she may have questions.

And I am sending you my support pack Raising Self-Esteem to help you build up some positive feelings about yourself beforehand.

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