My wife wants a divorce but says she still loves me and is scared to hurt me – The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife said she wants a divorce but she still loves me and does not want to hurt me. I feel very confused.

It’s our 14th anniversary next month, having been together for 17 years. We never argue and have had more good times than bad.

I worry how this will affect our two kids.

My wife is 45, I am 46.

I have noticed she has been down lately and think she may have depression.

She agreed a lot of symptoms apply but she refuses to talk to anyone.

I can’t grasp her decision but I love her.

Even if we are over I want her to seek help.

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DEIDRE SAYS: If she has been coming to a decision that she wants a divorce then that process can be emotionally exhausting.

Rather than trying to diagnose her, hear what she is saying about why she wants a divorce.

Suggest couple counselling together.

It won’t necessarily fix a broken relationship but will help you separate as painlessly as possible, especially for the children – and your wife is more likely to accept she needs support if you show the way.

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