You … you with the bag over your head. … Everyone knows who you are … You’re a Jets fan, and you’re nervous, you’re wracked with anxiety, there’s a pit in your stomach.
It isn’t because you have a sinking feeling that your Jets will fall to 0-10.
It’s the possibility of your boys pulling off an any-given-Sunday upset of the Chargers.
It’s a real possibility.
Chargers coach Anthony Lynn has relayed the same message to his team that will be holding you hostage for three nerve-wracking hours on Sunday:
Beware of dog.
On the Yellow Brick Road to 0-16 and Trevor Lawrence (or 1-15 and Justin Fields), this is the largest pothole.
The Chargers don’t know how to lose as well as the Jets do, but make no mistake, they do know how to lose. They are 2-7, and five defeats have been by five points or less.
What ought to concern the Jets fan is the fight the unlovable losers displayed against the Patriots.
You may want them to go 0-16, but they don’t want to live the rest of their lives with the ignominy of 0-16.
Any team that loses its first nine games of the season has nothing to lose, nothing to fear but fear itself.
Any team that plays the team that has lost its first nine games of the season has everything to lose, and everything to fear including fear itself.
What undoubtedly is worrisome to the Jets fan is whether the bye week coming when it did will bring all this Jets momentum to a screeching halt.
Then there is the matter of Joe Flacco — who sure looked like Joe Cool again for much of the Patriots game — launching missiles to the triumvirate of Breshad Perriman, Denzel Mims and Jamison Crowder into a Chargers secondary that has intercepted just three passes and surrendered 18 touchdowns. Maybe they can all stay healthy in time for a progressing Sam Darnold (shoulder) to return next week against Tua Tagovailoa, but first things first.
The Jets fan will be counting heavily on a vengeful Kalen Ballage and a decimated secondary that figures be at the mercy of rookie phenom gunslinger Justin Herbert playing pitch-and-catch with Keenan Allen, Mike Williams and Hunter Henry.
Then again, the Jets fan who is familiar with a sleeping Samson having his strength drained when a Philistine cut his hair many years before before Super Bowl III should have recoiled in horror when Herbert showed up for his Wednesday press conference with most of his locks shorn.
Herbert (19 touchdowns, six interceptions) was confused by the Dolphins’ amoeba defense last Sunday and hardly sounded eager to match wits with the diabolical Gregg Williams when he said: “It’s a tough defense to go up against because you have to be prepared for a lot of things.”
Well, as far as rookie quarterbacks facing Williams in 2019, Gardner Minshew (three TDs, zero INTs) and Daniel Jones (four TDs, zero INTs) were prepared for a lot of things, even if Dwayne Haskins (two TDs, one INT) was not.
To prevent the Jets fan from losing hope, this would be a good time to remind him or her that for every Super Bowl III, there is a Buttfumble.
Keep the faith: The return of Joey Bosa (4.5 sacks) from a concussion will help a struggling Chargers defense that is tied for 27th in takeaways.
And the youth movement in the Jets secondary — Frank Gore was in high school when these pups were born — will feature rookies Bryce Hall and Ashtyn Davis.
And guess who the 1-8 Jaguars are playing? The 9-0 Steelers!
For Adam Gase’s Jets, this would be the perfect time for scoreboard watching. Alas, they seem laser focused on the Chargers instead. Just because Williams liked the energy and communication at Friday’s practice doesn’t mean it will translate to gameday. But film don’t lie. The Chargers should not be 8.5-point favorites over anyone.
Beware of dog.
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